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” Then I said, “But this is a dog.” He said, “I don’t care what she looks like.” Then I said, “You don’t understand. I’ve had Sex since I was nine years old.” He said, “You must have been quite a kid!”When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the motel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me, and a special room for Sex. He said that every room in the place was for sex. I said, “You don’t understand, Sex keeps me awake at night.” The clerk said, “Me too.”One day I entered Sex in a contest but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing there looking around. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me that I should have sold tickets. “But you don’t understand,” I said. “I had hoped to have Sex on TV.” He called me a show-off.When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said, “Your Honor, I had Sex before I was married.” The judge said,. .. is that your girlfriend?"Marion chuckled, "You might call her that."The cashier (who's name tag read Bea) nodded "She should probably do something about those eyebrows, they're sort of...manly?"Marion knew what the cashier was getting at and decided to end the poor girl's discomfort. "Nah, if we made them arches people wouldn't be able to tell what's under her skirt without raising it, and that's fairly taboo in these parts."Marion winked at this last bit and Bea chortled.Jeanette came back, this time with silver bangles and Marion nodded her approval but grabbed the Cosmo and asked Bea if she wouldn't mind watching their things for a moment before reattaching the lead and heading back to the magazine aisle with Jeanette trailing after. Upon arriving in the aisle they met by the only other shopper in the store a slightly portly man who looked like an extra from Deliverance if slightly tamer. As the man watched in amusement Marion instructed Jeanette to put the magazine on the.
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